I know this all begin because of my fault. But at the same time, they also have their own fault and they cannot blame me for what have been happened right now. I have my own reason why I do like this and I don't want anyone to get hurt because I'm still stayed there. Hmm, I think I always think about others feeling but for me? No one cares about me and ends up I all alone to face all of this. I've tried to understand them and always put them in the first place and forget about my feelings, about what I want but still, they blame on what have happened.

This life is so hard. and I almost give up to continue on what I want in my life. There are many challenges that I have to face everyday and this comes from people around me. I think to face people with different characters is so hard. Can i feel what is the 'happy life' for a once? It's okay if I could feel it once and I don't mind as long as I can feel it.

As I grow up, people keep testing my patience. And I still think in my mind, why I can still stand here with my fake smile and act like I'm the happiest person ever. Wow! I also don't know how I can survive when people keep spreading hate to me. My patience also have limits like other but do they think about that? I don't think so. They keep saying that I have to think about their feelings but? Erghh I hate to talk about it. Can I just disappear myself for a while and see who appreciate me while I'm still with them and who doesn't care about me.

I used this as my place to share my feelings, my thought because when I start speak no one will hear me. For this one and a half year, I felt really appreciated with Yana, Arni, Humairah, Intan, Wani and also Hani. They always there for me whenever I feel down and always cheer up my days. Seriously, I don't have anyone here and I only have them in my life. Thank You!